3 Vital Reasons to Manage the “Yes’s” in Your Life

Manage your Yes SimplifiedLife

It was as close to the perfect day as you could get.  We sat there, just me and her, licking our ice cream cones, watching folks as they drove into the square and circled the center statue, deciding with a flick of the blinker which way they would go that day.  Folks walked the street, moving in and out of open shop doors, kids dashed ahead of their parents, only to stop and dash back to make sure they were still in tow.   It was mid-day and just warm enough to not need a jacket.  We sat there in companionable silence, only speaking when something funny or out of the ordinary caught our attention.

As I sat there with my oldest girl, I thought to myself – “I am so glad I said “yes” to this moment.”

As I sat there soaking in the sun I recalled a conversation I had with her just a few weeks prior.

She came to my room, plopping down on my bed. I could tell she had a lot on her mind – Final senior year classes, her part-time job, sports, ACT’s, SAT’s, College applications, travel plans, summer plans, finances, friends – So much too do, so many things to consider and decisions to make.  I could tell she was overwhelmed.

Franklin TN Best Yes“Mom, what do I do?”  “How do I decided”  What if I make the wrong choice?” – The questions came fast and furious and I prayed that God would give me wisdom in that moment.  Senior year can be stressful, with a million and one decisions to make.  But I knew this was just the beginning for my young girl.  Every season of life holds a thousand and one of these same questions and all those questions demand an answer. A yes or a no.

As we worked through her questions I remember telling her something I had heard recently that had deeply impacted me.

“Sweetheart, you have to realize that you only have so many “yes’s” to give – and if you give too many “yes’s” away, then you’ll burn yourself out and make yourself sick.  The key is deciding what and who to give those “Yes’s” too.  Which ones, at the end of the day, really matter the most to you?”

“Once you decide what your “Yes’s” need to be then you take the rest of your list and those become “No’s” for right now.”

This is a lesson I have had to learn the hard way the last few years.  A few years ago I kept giving out “Yes’s” and ultimately burned myself out to the point that I became sick and deeply depressed.  I had given away to many of my valuable yes’s to a lot of good things…but, just because they were good, didn’t make them the right things.

In the end, my health, my family and my relationships suffered.

Now on this side of that dark season I am so much more careful about the “Yes’s I give.  I have started evaluating how many healthy “Yes’s” I can give in a day, a week, a month and in a year.  Once I have decided what my limit is,  I say “No” to everything else.  Margin in life has become deeply important to me.

One of the Yes’s for me was this trip with my girl. This trip that found us eating ice-cream and people watching in a bustling little town seven hours from home.  Sure, there’s plenty of stuff on my to-do list and a business on hold for a few days – But it’s a “Yes” I don’t regret giving.  This time with my girl.  With my book loving girl.  Who loves browsing small town shops and people watching as much as I do – this time with my girl I will never regret saying “Yes” too.

SimplifiedLife

3 Reasons To Manage The “Yes’s” In Your Life

  1. Because Relationships Matter: At the end of the day the”Yes’s” you give directly effects the relationships that matters most to us – for good or for bad. You have the power to decide which it will be.
  2. Your Health Will Thank You:  Often, when we give away to many of our “Yes’s” our health suffers.  Stress mounts, exercise decreases, bad eating increases and before we know it we have sacrificed one our our greatest assets – our health.  Without health we can not go and do as we are called too.  It pays to manage our “yes’s for the good of our health and for those we love and serve.
  3. You Can Actually Accomplish More: Believe it or not, you can accomplish more by managing your “yes” moments.  When your not pulled in so many directions, the things you have on your plate get done in a more timely  manner and often with better results.  Quality over quantity matters.

Remember – It matters who and what we give our “Yes’s” too.  So….Are you giving too many of your “Yes’s” away?

If so, what is one thing you can do today to reclaim some of those “Yes” moments and create healthy margin in your life?

Recommended Resource:  Living Forward by Michael Hyatt & Daniel Harkavy

*Disclaimer: This post contains affiliate links. If you choose to purchase through my affiliate link there is no extra cost to you. Simplified Life earns a small commission that helps us to keep this blog up and running.  Thanks so much for your support. See our full disclosure here.

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About The Author

Victoria Mininger

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7 COMMENTS

  1. Rebecca | 2nd Mar 16

    I couldn’t agree with you more! Sometimes we get so overwhelmed with our day to day activities that we don’t stop to kind of take it all in. We say yes to so much in order to not disappoint others. However in the end the person handing out all the yes’s is the one that is unhappy or suffering and no one but them seem to notice. It can make one feel very alone and saddened. This read was fantastic! Thank you for letting others know it is not just them and how changing how many yes’s they give out could ultimately make you and others around you so much more capable of being happy!

    • Victoria Mininger | 8th Mar 16

      You are right – we ultimately hurt ourselves when we give out to many yes’s. Thanks for stopping by Rebecca and joining the conversation.

  2. Kali | 7th Mar 16

    I loved this. It is so true, we only have a certain number of yes’s that we can realistically give. Thanks for the encouragement to really think about what I say yes to in my life.

    • Victoria Mininger | 8th Mar 16

      You are welcome Kali – Thank you so much for stopping by the Simplified Life

  3. Geri Burgener | 11th Mar 16

    Where did you get all that wisdom for one so young? At 73 I’ve still not learned to say No often enough. Your Simplified Life is such a refreshing post! God go with you!

    • Victoria Mininger | 11th Mar 16

      Ahh..thanks Geri. I wish I knew some of this stuff in my 20’s because it would have saved me a ton of heartache and pain I think. Much of it is learned in the trenches of life for sure. Thanks so much for stopping by and sharing your thoughts. I hope you and Bob are doing well.

  4. LZ Cathcart@ The Summery Umbrella | 9th Apr 16

    Oh wow… what a great reminder. I am so bad about saying no with my busy schedule, but so happy to have read this article to keep in mind that we only live once and I should never let these precious moments with my family go by too quickly. Thank you 🙂

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